The day I learned to meditate

This week has been crazy, and has drained me both emotionally and physically. I'm going to try and fill everyone in as much as possible as to what has been going on, but it's going to be the brief version. This post would just be WAYY  too long if I indulged in every single detail.

Last Thursday, my khun mee picked me up from school, like usual, and then proceeded to tell me that her best friend was dying from cancer. She wanted me to go visit her before she died- which she was anticipating any moment. I agreed.. I mean you can't really turn down something like that. So we drove to the house of the women, and I was faced with probably the most horrific, yet wonderful, scene. A women lay on the couch, definitely VERY sick, unresponsive, with oxygen tanks all around her. Literally everyone she knew was probably there. Friends kept walking in, family was on skype, and her three young kids were sitting in the middle of the floor working on their homework. The thing about Buddhism is that death is a huge deal, but its not a moment to show your grief of your passing love one. They are moving on to their next life, in their eyes, and its almost like a party. Sure, people were sad, but there we no tears, people were telling jokes, the little kids were playing with their toys. They were SO excited to see a farang in their house, that they gave me the best chair and warmed me up a cup of soy milk (which is my favorite.. I am loving the warm soymilk here). They asked me questions about how I liked Thailand, and about my family at home, for the entire 3 hours we were there they were the most hospitable people I have ever met. I wanted to shoo them away and tell them I was ok, they needed to go take care of their dying family member! I was almost in tears for them, and then their kindness just tore my heart  out. And the little kids were about to lose their mom, but the little girl was just happy showing me her fake monopoly money and telling me about how her aunt did her hair. We left at 11, and the woman died at 1 that morning, 2 hours after I left.

Needless to say, I was ready for our retreat to a forest temple over the weekend. I needed to get away from the hustle and bustle of life and think. It was also nice to be back with everyone in the program again, we hardly get to spend time with each other away from school. On the drive to the temple, we visited a wat that was over 900 years old. We also went to a CAVE (!!) and walked around, looking at the stalagmites and stalagtites (spelling..? haha). That was awesome.

When we arrived to the forest wat, we were instructed to put on our elephant pants. No complaints there. You could tell me I had to wear those every single day for the rest of my life, and I would cry tears of happiness. Yiannoula and I decided to go explore the temple, and we were suddenly greeted by a monk who made us sweep all the leaves from all the walk ways. That was a bit of a surprise. During our sweeping excursions, I also met a peacock. He wouldn't spread his feathers for me though. Apparenlty he has to be in the mood to mate..and I guess I just wasn't what he wanted. haha..ew. Anyways.. after we were done cleaning we all were taught how to meditate by monks. Now I know Christians tend to get up in a hizzy about meditation, but let me explain. The purpose of meditation is not worshipping the Buddha (in fact, they knew we were Christians so they told us we didn't have to bow three times to the relic..so they were very respectful of our beliefs). The purpose of meditation is to focus on the present, to forget about what is worrying you about the past and the future, but to relax, take in the peace around you, and realize the blessings you have recieved in life. So, I think its actually a thing Christians should practice! Removing yourself from the world (living in the world but not of it), realizing our purpose on Earth as God has decreed us, relishing in peace.. its something that I think everyone should try at least once.

Now, that I've said that, I must admit I wasn't very good at meditation. I'm not a very quiet person.. (some people are probably saying thats the understatement of the year right there..) so mainting quiet for that long was very hard for me. And my feet fell asleep to the point where I couldn't even move my toes anymore. But it was SO relaxing, and once I got the hang of it and focused on my breathing, it was definitely worth while.

We slept on the floor on a small mat, and then got up at 5 in the morning to go into the village to give alms to the monks. People in the village go out everymorning and buy their favorite foods, and put it in the bowls teh monks use. This food is used to feed the monks, and is available for any impoverished person. People know that if they are in a position where they are not able to make a meal, they can always go to their temple and they will be fed. Wouldn't be great if every hungry person knew that if they could go to a church, they would be fed? Just a thought. Anyways.. I bought warm soy milk (told you I loved it!) and a bunch of bananas..(wow. delicious), and gave my alms. That was a very interesting experience.

We went back to the temple, just in time to see the sunrise over the mountain. This was so beautiful, and I just sat there with my warm soy milk..(I bought myself some too.. can't let the monks have all the goodness) and watched God's creation light up. I was overwhelmed with everything that had happened, and I had been reading Genesis after I meditated. That sunrise just seemed like a promise that there is so much more out there, that the world is a place to be explored and cherished. It made everything that has been happening come together in an amazing way. I'm kind of failing for words right now of how I felt, and I hope I'm not boring you with all this emotional jargon, but I was really moved and really felt changed.

View of the sunrise from the temple

This past week has been different too! I spent Monday and Tuesday at Baan Ponsawan, and then I was asked to start another internship for Wednesdays and Thursdays. I go to a developmental hospital in Chiang Mai, and help out with a Musical Production for their drama therapy department. I work with people with autism, downs syndrome, and other developmental disabilities. I'm there to help them sing and keep pitch, and I even get a feature in the show! This show is a big deal...they are having 3 performances and the Princess is supposed to even come, not to mention Kim Phipps. I'm so blessed that I was asked to perform, and am SUPER excited. It's also such a great break from the hustle and exhaustion of Baan Ponsawan, and I always feel encouraged after working with the AMAZING people in the production.

Love and miss you all SO much! Thank you for all your kind letters and messages, they really mean the world!

Also, I realized there have been A LOT of typos in my past posts, and I thought I should give an excuse. The computers here are really slow, so they don't register all that I am typing when I type it. So basically I am typing without seeing what I'm typing.. so don't worry, my English hasn't gone completely downhill!

Hope you enjoyed all the pictures! :)
<3 Kitty

The day I made my International Beauty Pagent debut

I know a lot of you have been waiting for this story, ever since I put on my facebook that I was entering in an International Beauty Contest here in Chiang Mai. Here is the down low:

On Thursday, my professor came to us girls in the program, and said that they really needed girls for the International Beauty Contest for the Flower Festival here in Chiang Mai. It sounded like a lot of fun, and how often can you say that you were in an International Beauty Contest? So about 7 of us girls agreed to join.

After a day full of art on campus ( I learned how to watercolor..which I am horrible at but I actually find really relaxing! I have been painting a lot in my free time) us girls were transported to a fancy hotel in the middle of teh city, where we met the other contestants. These girls were from all over! Japan, Belgium, the Netherlands, Canada, America, Italy, etc. They were all asked on the streets to join the contest, and they all decided to take a crack at it. We arrived at 3 p.m, and spent the next 3 hours getting our hair done (in the traditional Thai style, a HUGE unflattering bun on top of the head), getting our makeup done (where they proceeed to darken (!!) my eyebrows, put on blue eyeshadow, and bright pink lip gloss. I looked like a child in the 80s that stole their mom's makeup and tried to do it themselves), and dressed us in Traditional Thai outfits. Needless today, I looked silly. All of us looked silly. We definitely were not Asian enough to pull any of that off, but that didn't matter. Its all about the Sanok (fun) in Thailand!

They loaded us all into a fancy shmancy bus, complete with a police escort, and took us into the middle of the city where the competition was giong to take place. When they told me that it was not giong to be a big deal, the definitely lied. Probably a thousand different people were there for the festival and the beauty contest, and there was a real stage with lights and microphones and everything. People were crowding around us to take pictures with us, and they were yelling "suay maak!" (very beautiful!) every where we turned. It was very overwhelming, but at least we got to use the bathroom for free!

First was the Thai beauty pagent, and these girls were LEGIT. Huge fancy dresses, white powder on their skin, perfect makeup, these girls weren't messing around. This took about 3 hours....3 hours of us sitting around. We were exhausted by the time they ushered us to the back of the stage, where they proceeded to tell us that we had to stand in front of everyone, introduce ourselves, and do a little performance to show our personality. Fortunately, I knew about the "act" and had prepared to sing head shoulders knees and toes in thai (these weren't supposed to be serious acts..haha) but a lot of the girls were freaking out trying to prepare something. They then rushed us on stage, and we walked around in circles, bowing to the audience. We then got up one by one to introduce ourselves, and give our little performance. Some girls acted, some did magic tricks, one girl sang "I'm a little teapot." When I got up there, I decided to let it all loose and be confidant. I buthchered my introduction (because I attempted it in Thai) but they were all laughing at me so that was good. And then I sang my song, and everyone started singing along! It was great! They were all clapping and laughing. I had never heard a thousand people all sing head shoulders knees and toes (in Thai) all at the same time. It was alot of fun, and I felt good about it.

Needless to say, none of the girls from the semester program won. The girl from Japan won, but we all had a lot of fun, and got to be on National Thai TV!

The next day was a lot of fun too. It was the Flower Festival in Chiang Mai with parade floats decorated in flowers, and a TON of food to eat. We rented a bamboo mat and sat around in the shade by a pond, where we fed fish and watch little kids chase the pigeons. Nice and relaxing end to a hectic weekend.

Things have been going well at school and with teaching. Midterm papers are due next week, so we are all trying to frantically write ours before we go on our meditation retreat this weekend. The kids at Baan Ponsawan still have  A LOT of energy, but Jenny and I are finding new ways to manage each day. All of us are pretty exhausted by this point, and we can't wait for spring break next month, but we have to keep pushing through! I've also gotten to eat some interesting foods including a fish head, pork intestine soup, and stirfried ant eggs (which actually wasn't that bad!) I've also learned about different language mistakes that I have been making which have been pretty embarrassing (I keep trying to order bananas..kluay said in a really high tone, but when said in a different, low tone,  I am accidently ordering a part of the male anatomy. I get a lot strange looks haha).

Love and miss you all!
Kitty

The day I became "Teacher"

Life has started to become more of a routine. I wake up each morning, take a shower, eat sticky rice and moo bing, and head off to school. After a half a day of language and Thai culture classes, we all head to the canteen on campus to eat some delicious food. I always end my meal with a fresh fruit shake, or roti (which I just discovered... fried dough with banana, chocolate, and sweetened condensed milk drizzled of their top. TO DIE FOR. literally.) After that, I file into the rod dang and head off to my internship: Baan Ponsawan.

Baan Ponsawan is a Catholic organization centered out of Chiang Mai. Kathleen, the American founder and director, saw a need for poor tribal kids to gain a quality education, which they were not recieving in the various remote places they lived. She also gathered kids from the slums, and built a place for all of them to live. All of these kids attend school together at a near by wat, or Buddhist temple, that has a vision for education poor children so they can move their way up in the world.

Jenny and I teach English to 4th grade- a handful. This is the age when they realize that they can back talk the teacher and do what they want. We make our lesson plans the day before, usually full of games and crafts to keep the kids entertained (or else we lose them SUPER fast). We walked into the class room on our first day (which is really basic...wood desks and chairs, and a chalk board. We have to come up with all of our own materials), and realized how much of a challenge this internship was actually going to be. Kids were throwing books at each other's heads. Two boys were having a fist fight in the middle of the room. A girl was crying in the corner. We quickly sat everyone down, and frantically tried to get their attention. I honestly cannot remember teaching a single thing the first day, it was all about gaining the respect that we deserve. 5 kids left the class room as soon as we started teaching and didn't come back.

Kathleen gave all the students a talking to, and it has gone A LOT better since the first day. We gave them all farang names, which they loved. We have taught them colors and clothing, and we are in the process of teaching them how to read all that they have learned. A few of the boys still are very disrespectful (one in particular...he cussed me out yesterday and brought a knife to school today..), but it has become a lot easier to handle. They respect us and will listen to what we say, and love the games we play. I am beginning to fall in love with these kids.

After we teach, we play duck duck goose, or Miss Mary Mack (which girls AND boys are obsessed with), or redlight green light for about a half an hour. This is when I get closer with the kids. Letting out all the stress of the class room and just running around with them like maniacs is SO much fun. They like to play volleyball, and I taught them how to set (WHAT?! i can barely set myself. but they loved it. haha). A few kids in particular are always hanging around me, teaching me Thai and laughing at my horrible pronunciation. If I could be somewhere all day, that is what I would be doing.

We then take all the kids and walk them back the 2 miles home to Baan Ponsawan. I have two walking buddies that have not left my side since the first day. A couple of days ago, we literally jumped all the way home. Yesterday, I learned head shoulders knees and toes in Thai (hua lay kaw taw kaw taw...I hope you're impressed) and today I taught them the words to Miss Mary Mack, so they can play by themselves.

After I'm done my 4 hours of internship, I hop back in the rod dang, and take a nap on the 30 minute ride back to campus. Sometimes me and the other girls have a dance party using Yiannoula's Ipod speakers (that gets some interesting glances form alot of people..haha) but most of the time we are too exhausted to eat our complimentary banana cakes they give us each time we teach.

Needless to say, I LOVE IT. I love it so much that I am staying an extra month in Thailand to gain my Teaching English as a Foreign Language certifcation. But, at the same time, I am extremely tired and my patience is running thin. I would really appreciate prayers as I try to deal with the few unruly students, and as Jenny and I try and think of more lesson plans!

Me and some of the kids from my class